Ambulance Chasing Irish Style

What Happens in Ireland When You Need an Ambulance:

Yesterday, our neighbor's son Paul came charging to our door. The poor kid was scared to death; his 13 year old chin was quivering like Jello: "You have to come now! My Mum has collapsed!" So, of course, that's exactly what we did. My wife and I ran next door to discover our wonderful neighbor Paula lying inert on her stair's landing. She was breathing, had a strong pulse, but she was absolutely comatose.

At which point my good wife sprung into action. "Call 999!" she yelled. ("999" in case you didn't get it, is the Irish equivalent of 911.) "We need an ambulance! Right now!" And the young neighbor's son, Paul, did exactly that. Without hesitating, he ran to the phone.

And while we made Paula confortable, we took comfort in the knowledge that a local ambulance - complete with its crew of EMT specialists - was steaming toward us, blue lights blazing, weaving in and out of traffic on its way to rescue a favorite friend.

Now - before moving on - I should explain the following: Paula and her family don't have health insurance. At least not the type that many US citizens have. And yet, my wife, Paula, or her young son didn't think twice about calling for an ambulance.

Why?

The cost to Paula and her family was exactly... (wait for it)... ZERO!

What Happens in the US When You Need an Ambulance:

If you're not insured, all hell breaks loose. Two weeks ago, I had the pleasure of visiting Kernville, California. In case you didn't know it, Kernville is located about 2 and a half hours NNW of Los Angeles, and maybe an hour or so from Bakersfield. Located in the arid corners of the Sierra Nevada mountains, and maybe 3 hours from Death Valley, I was struck by the beauty of the spot. The Kern River curls around the town, its tumbling energy attracting trout fishermen (or is that fisher-people, if I'm to be PC?) from all over the Western US.

Kernville has also become a fairly popular destination for retirees. Housing costs - at least by California standards - are relatively reasonable. And the location is everything you would want if you're the type to enjoy the outdoors.

But there's a problem. For you see, Kernville is a good 60 miles from the nearest hospital. And that, of course, means an Ambulance trip if you get into trouble.

I was made aware of this fact - and worry - while having a beer at the local tavern. A retired Viet Nam vet was bitching and moaning about this sad state of affairs over his bottle of Coors: "I love Kernville. But I get worried about medical costs," he said. "Recently, my friend's wife got sick. They called the ambulance to take her into Bakersfield. He was the one that almost died when he got the bill. Just transporting her from here to the hospital was over two thousand dollars. He doens't have insurance, of course."

I've been gone for too long because I almost choked on my Miller.

When I got back, I did a bit of research. Many US ambulance companies charge by the mile. And if you don't have insurance, you get stuck with it. So what does one do in California...or Maine, Florida, or Utah if - like Bernie and I - your neighbor's kid rushes to the door and his Mom needs an ambulance, and the family doesn't have insurance?

Pay through the nose, I guess.

The Pros and Cons of Socialized Medicine

Ireland, of course, has socialized medicine. That's why the ambulance bill was zero. Of course, somebody has to pick up the cost, and that someone is the taxpayer. Remember, please, that Ireland has some of the most onerous taxes in the western world. We're taxed on almost everything: salaries, of course. But we also pay a 21.5% sales tax on almost all goods and services; additional taxes when we buy cars, houses, and investment or summer houses; and tax levies on almost anything that you can imagine...television programming, credit cards, check writing... It's a horrible state of affairs, and means that many people take home less than 50% of their gross pay.

BUT, and it's an important BUT...at least if we want to order an ambulance we know that it won't break the bank. Nor will Irish citizens have to declare bankrupcy if they're uninsured and need a hip replacement, or triple bypass, or require a kidney transplant.

The downsides of socialized medicine are immense: the Irish government is ultimately responsible for the levels of care that we receive. To that end, they've developed a huge, cost-inefficient bureacracy - our Health Board - to oversee national medical care. Recently, and due to the current economic mess - a variety of interest groups have analyzed the costs of that care. And the results have proven eye-opening: huge amounts of waste - particularly within administrative levels - have gone unreported, and undetected, for years. Which means, of course, that Irish taxpayers have not received the sort of cost-effective care that they are entitled to.

As a confirmed fiscal conservative, such waste bothers me deeply. And as I watch Obama's health care proposals move through its various stages, I can only feel sorry for Americans as they ponder the consequences of a national health program ultimately run by bureaucrats. Deciding pro or con on such legislation will be difficult.

While I am not totally convinced of the efficiency of national health programs, all I can say is this: when we rang for an Ambulance to help Paula, we didn't think twice about the cost.

For more stories on living in Ireland, consider Tom Richards book A Survivor's Guide to Living in Ireland, available at http://www.escapeartist.com/.