Monday, September 26, 2016

A Winning Way to Find a Literary Agent

I've been writing fiction, non-fiction, memoirs, blogs, websites, case studies - in fact pretty much anything that will take ink (or virtual ink) - for many years. And if you're also a writer you know how tough it is. But writing - fortunately or unfortunately - is only the start of the process particularly if you want to become traditionally published. Having finished a manuscript a writer still has many more mountains to climb.

One of the toughest of those peaks is landing a literary agent. In days gone by I was fortunate to have just such a person. But that fellow is long since retired. Consequently, and having finished a new novel, Dolphin Song (which was a huge undertaking for me - I won't even tell you how many years it took to complete), I have to start all over again.

In other words, my voyage toward finding a literary agent is once again just leaving port.

If you're in the same boat, then you're possibly doing what I am... a) asking anyone you know if they have an agent and, if so, begging for a reference  b) scouring the Internet for appropriate information and contacts and c) praying that your erstwhile journey will eventually prove fruitful before your emotional ship sinks at port.

However, I've found another avenue and thought I'd share it with you. A writer from Cincinnati, Mr Chuck Sambuchino, has organized a series of online contests - Dear Lucky Agent - which matches agents looking for authors and authors looking for agents. It's a wonderful idea which has proven successful for many.

So if, like me, you're looking for that elusive, plucky, loyal agent why not check out Chuck's website: http://www.writersdigest.com/editor-blogs/guide-to-literary-agents/24th-free-dear-lucky-agent-contest-literary-fiction.  Alternatively, visit the contest URL: http://tinyurl.com/hmelhd3  Or contact him via Facebook or Twitter (@chucksambuchino ). 

Sunday, September 25, 2016

"Oops, No Fuel" - A Pilot's Tale of a C-46

This particular entry has nothing to do with Ireland, actually. You see, my father - now 87 and a retired United Airlines Captain - this morning told me a story. It's a keeper and I wanted to share it with you all. Too, I'm fortunate to have a number of friends who are airline pilots and in many ways this is for them.

You see, these friends of mine fly those big jetliners made of aluminium metal tubes across the wide oceans to global points of interest. While they really are professionally-trained pilots (honest!) I suspect they spend much of their time on trips playing whist because the aircraft is usually on autopilot and controlled by computers much more powerful than those that steered the Apollo Moon Shots across the vacuum of space. In other words, and unless something goes quite wrong (which very rarely happens) they don't have a whole lot to do.

Sixty years ago that wasn't the case. Back in 1953, my father was a budding new co-pilot for the now defunct Resort Airlines. In those days he flew a C-46 (see pic), also a metal tube, that was driven through the air by two large Pratt & Whitney engines which spun a couple of large metal props. The objective of any flight was to reach the final destination by making certain those propellers kept spinning 'round n 'round.

Like any aircraft (except for those new-fangled solar powered babies which soar silently through the sky), the C-46 engines were powered by aviation gasoline. This particular aircraft had three fuel tanks: a mid-sized one at the front of the airplane, a smaller one at the rear, and the main tank in the center.

Dad tells me that keeping the engines supplied with fuel was a rather critical manual procedure (unless you wanted the engines to stop running): use the forward tank first until it went dry. Then, before the engines stopped spinning, switch to the rear tank until that one went dry. And when both were empty, switch to the final main tank to safely complete the rest of the flight.

Switching tanks was a manual task. Each engine had a separate fuel control wheel. So for instance, spin the wheel for the left (port) engine a bit and you'd switch to a new tank. Spin the wheel for the right (starboard) tank in the same manner for a similar result. And both pilots - the captain and the co-pilot - had this same set of fuel controls so each could easily access them. All the pilots had to do was remember which tank was filled with what, and who was responsible for switching which engine when the time came, and it worked just fine.

But then there was the trip Dad told me about, flying from Boise Idaho to Kansas City . This was a Cargo flight so no passengers or crew (other than our erstwhile pilots) were on board.The night flight took his C-46 over America's gigantic Rocky Mountains. A C-46 wasn't pressurized which meant they couldn't fly above 10,000 feet. So they had to be sorta careful 'cause the mountain peaks weren't too very far below.

Anyway, Dad the co-pilot and his Captain were having a merry little flight over the mountains. The props were spinning 'round and 'round as they should be. It was time for a fuel change (they were running the engines  on the front fuel tank which was approaching empty) so Dad switched both engines to the rear tank. No problem. When:

Both engines went deathly silent due to fuel starvation and the props, with nothing better to do, turned freely in the breeze which was absolutely not the plan. The C-46 was now a flying brick. Flustered, and unbeknownst to each other, both pilots reached for their respective fuel wheels at the same time. The problem? Neither realized the other was switching tanks. So Dad moved the fuel wheels for both engines up a notch. The Captain did the same thing. And the engines sputtered to life. They grinned at each other in great relief and joked about it. Which is when...

The engines died again. They had not yet recovered the altitude they'd lost the first time the engines stopped running, and neither could figure out what had happened. What they didn't realize was: when switching tanks the last time, and in all the confusion, they'd managed to switch both engines to the front tank - which, of course, was empty.

After much swearing, praying, and wondering just how close a rocky peak might be to the aircraft's underbelly, they finally discovered their mistake. They switched the engines to the full main tank. Both engines caught. The props started spinning around again, and they completed the rest of the flight to Kansas City without another word said between them, thanking their lucky stars all the way.

Until today Dad never told me this story. And I don't wonder. If he and his Captain hadn't realized their mistake, I might not be here. And as for my airline pilot buddies: thank God for those little computers is all I can say. At least you can keep on playing whist knowing you'll never have to remember to manually switch tanks.

Happy Landings!

A Survivor's Guide to Living in Ireland 2015 / 2016 Kindle Edition Now Available!
If this blog interests you, then you might want to know more about living and working in Ireland. Are you thinking of traveling to Irelandmoving to Irelandworking in Ireland? Do you want to understand what makes the Irish tick, how you can get a job here, and how to survive in this wonderful country? If so, consider purchasing the 2015 Kindle edition of A Survivor's Guide to Living in Ireland. Over 11,000 have already done so! Now over 85,000 words long, this book could make the perfect gift for those interested in this wonderful country. Simply click on any of the above links to purchase the new 2015 Kindle edition. You can also download free apps to read the Kindle version on any PC or Mac. 


"Oops, No Fuel" - A Pilot's Tale of a C-46

This particular entry has nothing to do with Ireland, actually. You see, my father - now 87 and a retired United Airlines Captain - this morning told me a story. It's a keeper and I wanted to share it with you all. Too, I'm fortunate to have a number of friends who are airline pilots and in many ways this is for them.

You see, these friends of mine fly those big jetliners made of aluminium metal tubes across the wide oceans to global points of interest. While they really are professionally-trained pilots (honest!) I suspect they spend much of their time on trips playing whist because the aircraft is usually on autopilot and controlled by computers much more powerful than those that steered the Apollo Moon Shots across the vacuum of space. In other words, and unless something goes quite wrong (which very rarely happens) they don't have a whole lot to do.

Sixty years ago that wasn't the case. Back in 1953, my father was a budding new co-pilot for the now defunct Resort Airlines. In those days he flew a C-46 (see pic), also a metal tube, that was driven through the air by two large Pratt & Whitney engines which spun a couple of large metal props. The objective of any flight was to reach the final destination by making certain those propellers kept spinning 'round n 'round.

Like any aircraft (except for those new-fangled solar powered babies which soar silently through the sky), the C-46 engines were powered by aviation gasoline. This particular aircraft had three fuel tanks: a mid-sized one at the front of the airplane, a smaller one at the rear, and the main tank in the center.

Dad tells me that keeping the engines supplied with fuel was a rather critical manual procedure (unless you wanted the engines to stop running): use the forward tank first until it went dry. Then, before the engines stopped spinning, switch to the rear tank until that one went dry. And when both were empty, switch to the final main tank to safely complete the rest of the flight.

Switching tanks was a manual task. Each engine had a separate fuel control wheel. So for instance, spin the wheel for the left (port) engine a bit and you'd switch to a new tank. Spin the wheel for the right (starboard) tank in the same manner for a similar result. And both pilots - the captain and the co-pilot - had this same set of fuel controls so each could easily access them. All the pilots had to do was remember which tank was filled with what, and who was responsible for switching which engine when the time came, and it worked just fine.

But then there was the trip Dad told me about, flying from Boise Idaho to Kansas City. The night flight took his C-46 over America's gigantic Rocky Mountains. A C-46 wasn't pressurized which meant they couldn't fly above 10,000 feet. So they had to be sorta careful 'cause the mountain peaks weren't too very far below.

Anyway, Dad the co-pilot and his Captain were having a merry little flight over the mountains. The props were spinning 'round and 'round as they should be. It was time for a fuel change (they were running the engines  on the front fuel tank which was approaching empty) so Dad switched both engines to the rear tank. No problem. When:

Both engines went deathly silent due to fuel starvation and the props, with nothing better to do, turned freely in the breeze which was absolutely not the plan. The C-46 was now a flying brick. Flustered, and unbeknownst to each other, both pilots reached for their respective fuel wheels at the same time. The problem? Neither realized the other was switching tanks. So Dad moved the fuel wheels for both engines up a notch. The Captain did the same thing. And the engines sputtered to life. They grinned at each other in great relief and joked about it. Which is when...

The engines died again. They had not yet recovered the altitude they'd lost the first time the engines stopped running, and neither could figure out what had happened. What they didn't realize was: when switching tanks the last time, and in all the confusion, they'd managed to switch both engines to the front tank - which, of course, was empty.

After much swearing, praying, and wondering just how close a rocky peak might be to the aircraft's underbelly, they finally discovered their mistake. They switched the engines to the full main tank. Both engines caught. The props started spinning around again, and they completed the rest of the flight to Kansas City without another word said between them, thanking their lucky stars all the way.

Until today Dad never told me this story. And I don't wonder. If he and his Captain hadn't realized their mistake, I might not be here. And as for my airline pilot buddies: thank God for those little computers is all I can say. At least you can keep on playing whist knowing you'll never have to remember to manually switch tanks.

Happy Landings!

A Survivor's Guide to Living in Ireland 2015 / 2016 Kindle Edition Now Available!
If this blog interests you, then you might want to know more about living and working in Ireland. Are you thinking of traveling to Irelandmoving to Irelandworking in Ireland? Do you want to understand what makes the Irish tick, how you can get a job here, and how to survive in this wonderful country? If so, consider purchasing the 2015 Kindle edition of A Survivor's Guide to Living in Ireland. Over 11,000 have already done so! Now over 85,000 words long, this book could make the perfect gift for those interested in this wonderful country. Simply click on any of the above links to purchase the new 2015 Kindle edition. You can also download free apps to read the Kindle version on any PC or Mac. 


Friday, September 9, 2016

Apple, Brexit, and Catastrophe. The ABCs that Could Topple Ireland's Skyrocketing Economy

So. You're thinking of moving to Ireland and you think to yourself: "I'd better get a job!" And why not! Everyone else seems to be doing it. The economy here is in strong recovery. Unemployment has fallen from a high approaching 20 percent of the working population in 2010 to only 8% as I write. The economy is stampeding forward. The number-crunching lads figured out that in 2015 Ireland's Gross Domestic Product (GDP) grew at an astonishing 26%. I'll repeat that.

26 PERCENT!

So what could possibly go wrong? Well, a couple of things actually. And if you're looking to get a job here I'd suggest you look quick because Ireland's post-Great Recession, post-Celtic Tiger economic miracle could unravel. Fast. If it does it's going to sound like a drunk hitting the floor with a resounding Splat. And we're all going to get caught in the messy aftermath.

The Brexit Doomsayers

If you haven't heard of Brexit you've possibly been stuck in a pub for too long. A few weeks back many of the citizens of Great Britain voted to leave the European Union. So what? you may ask. If you're living in Ireland it's a very big deal, that's what.

Ireland exports over a billion quid's worth of goods to Great Britain every year. It is one of the country's most important and valuable trading partners. Exports to the UK keep thousands of Irish workers in jobs. When Britain finally leaves the EU it's quite possible that trade barriers will be erected. Import restrictions could well become the order of the day. And that spells trouble. 

The value of sterling has already plunged on International monetary markets, making exports from Ireland to GB over 10 percent more expensive. Due to currency exchange rates alone, the demand for Irish goods and services is falling if not like a brick, then with enough velocity to get worried. Local news is full of reports of Irish businesses being forced to curtail contracts with the UK because profit margins are being squeezed to the breaking point. And what's of real concern is: the UK has not yet exited from the EU. That will occur well down the road, possibly in late 2017 or 2018. But the vote to Leave was enough and has already hit the Irish economy and its workers. Hard.

The worst case scenario is hard to accept. Should the UK go into recession as some are forecasting, that situation - together with the already mentioned dismal currency exchange rates - will shrink UK consumer demand. That will put a downward squeeze on the demand for Irish goods and services. If demand falls Irish employers will have no choice but to sack their workforce. And I worry it could be in droves.

But if Brexit isn't enough of a challenge let's look at the Apple fiasco.

Making Apple Sauce of Ireland's Tax System

Apple, that nice little iPhone maker and world's most valuable company, has for years been minimising taxes using a number of off-shore mechanisms. Ireland has been key to that strategy. Very recently, EU mandarins accused Apple of benefiting from Irish tax legislation that it deemed uniquely beneficial - and therefore illegal. It is demanding Apple pay over €13 billion to the Irish Exchequer in unpaid corporate profits tax. And that doesn't include penalties and interest which it has yet to apply. 

On the face of it this doesn't look like a bad thing, at least not for the burdened Irish taxpayer. After all, 13 billion euro can build a good few hospitals or fill the gigantic potholes in Ireland's creaking road system. However, the Irish government finds itself in a quandary.

If it accepts the EU's decision it means that it accepts the opinion that Ireland's tax treatment of Apple was illegal. If it does that it may have to admit that its entire tax policies are illegal which means that it may have to impose new rules on all companies operating here - including huge employers like Google, EMC, IBM, and so many others. And if it does that? Those companies could leave in droves as they look for greener, more tax-friendly, homes.

So what is the government doing? They are planning to appeal the EU ruling. In other words, they don't want to take 13 billion euro off Apple's hands. Of course, Irish citizens are going somewhat nuts. "Refuse 13 billion? Are you mad?" some yell. So no matter what the government does they're in trouble. If they accept the ruling and accept the money, they could possibly drive away large employers. If they win the appeal, they're going to piss-off the big chiefs who manage the European Union, which could have lasting implications. In this case the only real winner will be Apple and its shareholders, who will be able to continue to shelter that wee stash of cash.

But the Apple conundrum also stirs uncertainty in the Irish business community - and business managers hate uncertainty. If Apple isn't stewed carefully the situation could turn into something much more than Apple-sauce. It could mean a reduction in jobs across the board as Ireland's companies reconsider their options.

Apple and Brexit illustrate the complexities and risks inherent in an open economy like Ireland. While the jury is still out regarding how these enormous issues will affect longer term economic stability in this country, one lesson becomes clear:

If you're looking for a job in Ireland, do it quick. 

(P.S.  You know that 26% growth I mentioned? Well maybe not. It turns out much of that growth is possibly attributed to Apple's migration of billions in European operating profits to Ireland for beneficial tax treatment. So that 26% number is inflated with moneys that don't really contribute to Ireland's economy or her people at all. Sigh...)

A Survivor's Guide to Living in Ireland 2015 / 2016 Kindle Edition Now Available!
If this blog interests you, then you might want to know more about living and working in Ireland. Are you thinking of traveling to Irelandmoving to Irelandworking in Ireland? Do you want to understand what makes the Irish tick, how you can get a job here, and how to survive in this wonderful country? If so, consider purchasing the 2015 Kindle edition of A Survivor's Guide to Living in Ireland. Over 11,000 have already done so! Now over 85,000 words long, this book could make the perfect gift for those interested in this wonderful country. Simply click on any of the above links to purchase the new 2015 Kindle edition. You can also download free apps to read the Kindle version on any PC or Mac.